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Your Hollywood
Tina Fey’s cutting edge erased? Stallone vs. candy machine.
By Peter Gilstrap
Published: Apr 22, 2008
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DEL.ICIO.US
YAHOOAt 10:30 am on a Tuesday, there’s not a hell of a lot to look at when you’re stuck at a red light heading west on Hollywood Blvd at Cherokee sitting next to a city bus. On your left is a sidewalk homeless woman belting out some shaman-esque melody that’s low Mariah Carey mixed with high psychosis, on the right, the birdbath-sized face of Tina Fey on the bus-side advert for her film Baby Mama.
Now, I know Tina is funny. And I know she’s beautiful. And I know well that demure visage, with the delicate, devilish scar that runs like a forgotten off-road trail leading to a man’s imagination: Dueling incident? Broken bottle catfight? Cheerleading stack gone awry? But it wasn’t there. Gone. Erased. Sweet Tina’s face was wiped as clean as the “after” shot of cured teen’s acne ad. And, when I picked up a copy of Marie Claire in my acupuncturist’s office, cover girl Tina’s cheeks were as pure as driven snow.
Air brushed, nay computerized clean ups are de rigeur in Tinsel Town, of course. Boobs, asses, thighs, eye baggage, throat wattle, sure. But a prominent facial scar that everyone’s seen live on Saturday night for years—the same fans that will presumably plunk down their hard earned for Baby Mama—who does Lorne Michaels (SNL kingpin and the film’s producer) think he’s kidding? Or protecting, more to the point, from that horribly disfiguring wound on Fey’s face that will drive fans screaming from the box office?
Age-old Hollywood savvy stipulates that women need to be cleaned up. Marilyn Monroe’s teeth got fixed, Rita Hayworth endured electrolysis, starlet pounds are constantly being starved off. But when it comes to men, well, no one flinches at James Woods’ pitted mug—that adds character, which female stars are not allowed to have, other than perhaps a light Tilda Swinton freckling—and let’s not even get into Seal. Yet despite what the studio art departments may want to sell you, the true fans on the web provide the goods. Skinema.com offers the apparent scarage of names like Catherine Zeta-Jones, Sandra Bullock, Elizabeth Taylor and Sharon Stone, who’s curious neck scar has its very own site, SharonStonesScar.com. And believe me, they’re not all from vaccinations.
Okay. Now that I’ve just utterly denounced the tradition of falsifying images of women to make them more attractive, let me do a subtle Hollywood flip flop and introduce you to Singapore’s own Mr. Gary Lim, whose web site tells all…
“Learn the secret of airbrush makeup from Mr. Gary Lim, Hollywood trained professional airbrush makeup consultant. Mr. Gary Lim's return from Hollywood. It was started as a make-up department, to train make-up artists in a revolutionary way of applying make-up: Airbrush make-up. Workshop can be starts anytime.”
Interested? The $489.00 price is “negotiable,” as long as you have “cash.” And can get yourself to Singapore, Block / House No.1, Floor / Unit #03-23, Sophia Rd.
Submitted by Kate T. | Posted 119 days 16 hours |
I thought that Marie Claire cover was horrible. Not just the airbrushingthey styled her with hair in an updo and an outfit she clearly felt awkward in. Not cool. What makes her so beautiful is that she's completely low-key.
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