Sports Taught Americans to Ignore Sexual Assault

It should come as little surprise that an alleged sexual abuser has won a second presidential term and wants to appoint a cabinet full of sex pests, considering our long history of excusing our favorite athletes’ alleged assaults.

Within days of his election on November 5, Donald Trump, a man adjudicated liable for sexual abuse by a jury of his peers, nominated four men credibly accused of sexual misconduct for high-level cabinet positions in his impending administration. 

According to CBS News, Fox News host Pete Hegseth—Trump’s nominee for Secretary of Defense—paid a woman a confidential settlement so she wouldn’t further pursue a 2017 sexual assault claim against him. Hegseth denied any wrongdoing. RFK Jr., Trump’s pick to head the Department of Health and Human Services, was accused by a former babysitter of groping her on multiple occasions in the late 1990s. Elon Musk, who reportedly donated $250 million to help get Trump elected and was thus chosen to head up the newly created “Department of Government Efficiency,” reportedly paid a SpaceX flight attendant $250,000 after allegedly exposing himself and offering to buy her a horse in exchange for an “erotic massage,” though Musk has denied the claim. And former Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz, who Trump had tapped as his nominee for Attorney General, was investigated by the House Ethics Committee following allegations that he trafficked and sexually assaulted a 17-year-old girl. So far, Gaetz is the only one of Trump’s picks not to survive the nomination process. On December 18, the House Ethics Committee voted secretly to release the findings of their multi-year probe to the public after the House casts their final votes of this Congress this week.

Much of the nation was shocked by the selection of these potential appointees. “Misogyny Comes Roaring Back” screamed one headline; “Trump Defies the #MeToo Movement with Cabinet Picks” gasped another. At the same time, a very specific segment of young men online couldn’t contain their glee. “Your body, my choice. Forever,” wrote white nationalist and professional misogynist Nick Fuentes on X. Fuentes has since locked down his X account, but that tweet has been viewed more than 90 million times and reposted more than 35,000 times. Three accounts on Musk’s X platform now go by the handle “legalize rape,” and accounts openly calling for the legalization of rape are allowed to exist on X without moderation.

During the election, many politicians and cable-news talking heads ran down the list of reasons Donald Trump wasn’t qualified to be president: He tried to overthrow the Republic. He attempted to bully states into using a fake elector scheme. He’s in bed with dictators like Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong-Un. We heard these arguments ad nauseam from the Trump opposition. Rarely, however, did we hear “Trump was adjudicated liable for sexual assault in federal court.” Never did we hear “26 women have accused Trump of varying forms of sexual misconduct.” 

I’m old enough to remember when Howard Dean had to drop out of the presidential race because he let out an unearthly scream in Iowa, and Gary Hart had to stand down after a photo of him surfaced with his mistress on his lap. It would seem having a jury find that a presidential candidate committed sexual abuse should be an automatic disqualification. And yet, here we are.

As writer Andrea Ciannavei recently wrote on Threads, “TIME Magazine picking Trump as Person of the Year when Gisèle Pelicot [the French woman whose husband was sentenced to 20 years in prison for repeatedly drugging and raping her and enlisting at least 50 other men via the internet to rape his wife while she was unconscious] was right there is all you need to know about rape culture in this country.”

But while so many on the left were completely bewildered by the fact that Americans could willingly overlook the alleged sexual violence of the president-elect and his appointees, those of us who have covered sexual abuse and intimate partner violence in sports were not surprised in the least. For years, both the worlds of professional and college sports have been teaching young fans to overlook credible allegations of violence against women when it comes to their favorite athletes.

Kobe Bryant’s “Mamba Mentality” has become a slogan embraced by athletes across the board, from Little League players to WNBA stars. Bryant, who was killed in a helicopter accident in 2020, has even appeared in an ad for the WNBA. But few seem to remember that Bryant created his Mamba alter-ego as a response to being charged with allegedly raping a woman in Edwards, CO, in 2003. After the then-anonymous victim’s name was disclosed to the public six times by Bryant’s defense attorney, she was subjected to harassment on a horrific scale. A man in Iowa even offered to hunt her down and kill her. 

The woman eventually refused to go forward with the case, leading prosecutors to dismiss the charges just before the start of the criminal trial. But in a pre-trial hearing, the nurse who administered a rape kit to Bryant’s victim found multiple vaginal lacerations—“too many to count,” she testified at a pre-trial hearing—and trauma consistent with penetrating sexual trauma and not with consensual sex. 

Bryant and the woman eventually settled the case privately. The basketball player publicly apologized to his victim, saying:

“I also want to make it clear that I do not question the motives of this young woman. No money has been paid to this woman. She has agreed that this statement will not be used against me in the civil case. Although I truly believe this encounter between us was consensual, I recognize now that she did not and does not view this incident the same way I did. After months of reviewing discovery, listening to her attorney, and even her testimony, I now understand how she feels that she did not consent to this encounter.”

In the months and years following the resolution of the sexual assault case, the public slowly began to ignore the allegations against Bryant, though, in 2018, he was removed from a film-festival jury after a petition circulated objecting to his presence there. Following the L.A. Laker’s tragic death, however, even mentioning his “complicated” history became grounds for being disciplined at work or dragged by half the internet. In the wake of the crash that killed Bryant, reporter Felicia Somnez, a sexual assault survivor herself, was suspended by her employer, the Washington Post, for tweeting the link to an article breaking down the 2003 allegations against Bryant. 

I, too, have been a victim of sexual assault, and I will never forget driving into work the night of Bryant’s death and seeing much of the Chicago skyline awash in purple to honor his legacy. That legacy did not include space for the complicated feelings of women who may have been thinking about Bryant’s victim that night. To date, 644 murals celebrating Bryant have sprung up around the country and overseas.

Bryant’s apology is the closest thing to a confession we’ve ever seen from an athlete accused of violence against women. Even so, try posting on social media about the allegations against the basketball icon and watch how many young men (and, sadly, even some young women) come out of the woodwork to berate you for “spreading lies.” It seems an alternate history has sprung up among Millennials and Zoomers, one in which the L.A. Laker was acquitted and the woman who accused him was proclaimed by the court to be a liar. Of course, none of that ever happened, but it hasn’t stopped a large section of sports fandom from believing it did.

While Bryant’s ret-conned history might be the most egregious example of sports fans ignoring claims of sexual assault against a man they admire, it’s far from the only one. Retired Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger was cheered and celebrated by fans for 16 years and eight playoff appearances, despite two credible allegations that he committed sexual assault, one in 2009 and another in 2012. 

Four women have come forward to accuse former Dodgers pitcher Trevor Bauer of violent sexual assaults, yet he has amassed an army of angry young men who defend him against all comers while calling his accusers liars. Bauer has spent countless hours online maligning his victims and proclaiming his innocence. And, despite the fact that Major League Baseball heard all of Bauer’s explanations and professions of innocence and still gave him the longest suspension in MLB history, there is a significant number of young men online who adamantly believe him.

Cleveland Browns QB Deshaun Watson was suspended for 11 games by the NFL following an investigation into allegations of sexual misconduct made by 23 women Watson had hired as massage therapists. In September, Watson was accused of forcible rape by a 24th woman. Last week, the NFL said it would not take further disciplinary action against Watson despite the most recent allegation. 

Initially, the multiple lawsuits against Watson did nothing to deter some Browns fans, who infamously showed up to games with signs reading “Free Watson” and “Fuck Them Hoes,” and selling shirts that read, “Bitch, give me a massage.” Browns fans only turned on Watson when it became clear he wasn’t the star player they thought he was. When fans cheered after Watson suffered a season-ending injury in October, teammate Myles Garrett defended Watson, calling him “a model citizen.”

On a “You can’t make this up” note, Watson was replaced in the starting lineup by Jameis Winston, who was also accused of raping a woman in college and suspended by the NFL for groping an Uber driver in 2016. Days later, ESPN’s biggest NFL reporter, Adam Schefter, posted on multiple social media platforms that Winston was a “national treasure.”

After I commented on Schefter’s tweet on Bluesky, the predictable backlash followed. “No one really cares, h@e, eat a (eggplant emoji),” one man wrote. “He was innocent. Got married and saved and is active in his church and you post that garbage,” said another. “Both cases were dropped and this women [sic] is trying to villanize a successful man,” still another said.

In truth, none of the cases against Jameis Winston was dropped, because there never was a single criminal case. Even for the 31 percent of victims who do report their assault to the police, only a little over half of cases will be charged. And, too often, for the case to move forward,  the victim must be a “perfect” victim. What does it mean to be a perfect victim? Does the victim have a history of sexual “promiscuity?” Did they have anything to drink? Were they high? Did they wait too long before coming forward? Did trauma interfere with their recollection of the events? Is the alleged perp able to afford a team of defense attorneys? 

If any of those scenarios apply, there’s a good chance the prosecutor will decide not to file a criminal charge against the assailant. During my time as a criminal defense attorney, it became clear that, in cases involving sexual assault or domestic abuse, the judge or jury frequently starts with the belief that the victim is likely lying. Our society is so socialized to look for ulterior motives in victims of sexual assault that criminal trials involving rape too often end up as a referendum on the behavior of the victim rather than their attacker.

And therein lies the problem with how sports teams, both college and pro, handle allegations of sexual harm by their athletes. Many fans, at best, have a loose grasp of how the criminal justice system works, and even less of an understanding of the trauma of assault. When they see a player who has been accused of sexual misconduct avoid a suspension, dodge a criminal trial, and seemingly enjoy the support of his organization and teammates, they immediately assume the allegations must be false. It’s much harder to believe that their favorite team has chosen money over morality, stood by a potential sexual predator rather than a victim, and that all their favorite players have done the same. It’s far easier to accept that the woman is a gold digger looking for a quick payday.

Moreover, the frequency of false allegations is wildly overestimated by many Americans. One man told me on Bluesky that a cop told him “95 percent of rape allegations are false.” Other men have advised me that women make up allegations against famous men “all the time.” However, if national crime statistics are to be believed, false reports of sexual assaults are extremely rare. According to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, only between 2 and 10 percent of all reported cases involve false allegations, and there is no evidence that famous men are accused more frequently than the average guy on the street. 

On the other hand, the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) reports that for every 1,000 sexual assaults in the U.S., 50 perpetrators will be arrested, 28 will be convicted, 25 will spend time in prison, and 975 will walk free. That means that 97.5 percent of those who commit rape will suffer no real consequences for their crime. That’s a far bigger and more pervasive problem than the 2 to 10 percent who will be falsely accused (though rare, false allegations are still tragic), but most men I’ve encountered on the internet either: 1) don’t believe those numbers, or 2) believe that their favorite athlete is among a small number of people who will be falsely accused. 

There’s also the persistent belief that when it comes to powerful men, “crying rape” can be a quick and easy way for a woman to cash in. I can tell you from experience that reporting sexual assault to the police is no easy thing, even if the perpetrator is nobody special. Leveling allegations against a high-profile athlete, who has a team of lawyers, agents, publicists, and an entire professional sports team at his back is far more daunting—and that’s before you factor in their rabid fanbase.

The woman who successfully sued MMA fighter Conor McGregor for sexual assault was further traumatized by a gang of masked men who allegedly broke into her home and stabbed her boyfriend. The woman who accused then–Chicago Blackhawks star Patrick Kane of sexual assault in 2015 saw her name and face splashed all over social media, while Blackhawks fans called her names like “stupid skank” and speculated on where they might find her. NBA star Derrick Rose’s defense team was scolded by a judge for publicly slut-shaming the victim. After the Rose was held “not liable” in a civil sexual assault trial, the judge and jury took pictures with the NBA star. 

Last week, Texas Rep. Chip Roy addressed the allegations that Pete Hegseth had falsely imprisoned and forcibly raped a woman in a Monterey hotel room in 2017, saying, “You know, look, we’ve all had some indiscretions in our past and things like that. Every human has.” I don’t know what’s worse: That a sitting U.S. congressman sees alleged forcible rape as an “indiscretion” that all men have, that Roy seemingly told on himself, or that the rest of Washington D.C. just shrugged their shoulders and went about their day. In this new administration, violently assaulting a woman is not, and may never again be, a disqualifying behavior for the for a society steeped in rape culture. 

So if you’re wondering how we got to a place where the president-elect of the United States and four of his cabinet nominees have been credibly accused of sexual assault, , the answers can be found in the world of sports. They’ve established a long tradition of just how little violence against women matters.